After 20 years of war, it is time for new leadership and bold action. Abiy Ahmed: Relinquish territorial claims and end the conflict. Implement the 2002 ruling by the EEBA. Do this and Glamis will instruct the UN to drop sanctions. Get this done.

Rupert the Pigcaller is insane

Standing with his whistle in the pouring rain

Doesn’t hear the taunts, he doesn’t know fear

Grunting responses from far and near

In line with Amber Rudd’s pending resignation, Glamis and the Upper Chamber endorse Sajid Javid as her successor.

Westminster, Paris, Washington: Assad’s chemical attack on Douma cannot go unanswered. Recommend strike from above within one week. Coordinate your forces and contact Cathedral Tower on Forgotten Frequency to advise when ready.